living today while planning for the future

I want a happy adult relationship with my child where they desire my company and I desire theirs. To do so, we must both be balanced individuals who are living true to our own design. If I never discover my personal design and my ability to succeed, how will I guide my child to do the same?

If we expect our children to have a healthy understanding of who they are and how to maintain good physical and mental health for themselves, then they must see us modeling those habits. For each of us that looks a little different. Parenting comes in different stages with different times for each individual child to experience their unique situational dynamics. There will be times when they are consumed by filling needs that must happen at that moment. In those times we must intentionally pause so that we can invest in our own mental health too. 

You’ve heard the saying “There is no "I" in team,” but there still is a "me" that needs maintenance, or our team will be lost altogether.

Here is some food for thought: 

A healthy mental life requires us to feel successful in many areas. We need to feel good that in the long haul, we are fulfilling the design that we were created for as unique individuals. That looks like:  

1 - Breathing oxygen

2 - Eating healthy

3 – Sleeping well

4 – Exercising regularly

5 - Purposeful creative work 

6 - Regeneration

7 – Setting clear goals

8 – Living with good values and solid belief system

9 - Taking smart educated risks (with backup plans) 

10 - Being an open-minded learner

11 - Being actively present (in the here and now) not guilting on the past (regret) or waiting to act later (fear) 

12 - Not accepting compromises against internal beliefs

(This list was adapted from work by Dr. L. Coldwell)

Balance can be hard sometimes but it's necessary if we are going to maintain positive long-term relationships with our children. In the end, that’s one of our biggest goals.