roach to unicorn
Less than 50 percent of parents believe they are doing a good job parenting. That seems like a pretty small number to me! I’ve been working with parents for over thirty years, and whether the children in the home are small or teens, parents express feelings of inadequacy. The great news is that not everything we are doing is mind-numbing or exhausting. Think about the best day you’ve had parenting. Who was there with you? Why was it the best day ever?
If I can think of the worst parenting type possible, my mind quickly shoots to the roach. It’s a despicable animal that grosses many people out. However, roaches are pets or snack food in some cultures, so not everything about the roach is awful. I just think of them on a hot day in Florida and cringe when I think of the noise they make or the food they eat.
On the flip side, there are animals we enjoy. Some are big, fluffy, small, sweet, great companions or just cool to look at. Every animal has a list of positive features while simultaneously presenting a list of negative ones. That super cute puppy your child wants might bite or have an accident on the floor, and the long walks required might keep them in the lovable category while you know in the back of your mind that they are imperfect.
Just like your parenting, you can appreciate that you’re not the worst and acknowledge that you’re far from that mythically perfect creature, the unicorn. There’s no better parenting style than another, but each has strengths. If you find yourself satisfied with your parenting, take a look and consider what your parenting could or should look like.
Consider this:
What one thing could I practice doing this week that will help me be a better parent?
What one thing should I stop doing this week so that I can become a better parent?
What one thing would help me become more confident in my parenting? What roadblocks keep me believing I’m less adequate than I want to be?
What’s one thing I should celebrate in my parenting journey?
Each day you parent, you should find yourself associating less with the roach end of the scale and more with the unicorn end. How is that going today?
